The Leaving-Religion Resource Guide
How to deconstruct religion, find existential health, be happy in life, and make the perfect cup of coffee
Thank you for being a Deconstructionology subscriber! Your support is what makes this publication possible. To date, I have published 263 articles on Substack, covering a range of topics from religious deconstruction, existential health, non-religious spirituality, commentary on religious news, and a variety of subjects at the intersection of theology, philosophy and culture.
In those 263 articles I have recommended countless books and other resources, provided links to videos, podcasts and articles, and discussed several key figures associated with these topics of conversation. I decided to create a master list of recommended resources that I will update periodically. Hopefully you will find this to be a useful resource guide. I have organized the guide into several categories as you shall see, and offered brief descriptions of my recommendations.
Of course it’s impossible to list every worthwhile book and resource related to these areas, and I feel some trepidation in pondering those I did not include. Keep in mind that I forced myself to recommend only three books per category, in order to make such an endeavor manageable for the reader.
Most of these books are linked to Amazon. However, many of them are available through your public library, and some are available as a free online digital version.
Top Three Deconstruction Books Overall
There are many useful books written about religious deconstruction and the leaving-religion process. If a recent religion-leaver called and asked me what to read to get them grounded in a religious deconstruction process, I’d be prone to recommend these following three books. Two of them were published in the last couple years, and Leaving the Fold in 1993.
Last week I wrote an article about German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, who may have been the first person to have explicitly addressed several central religious deconstruction themes back in the late eighteenth century. But if someone contacted me at the beginning of their leaving-religion journey, I doubt I’d send them off to slog through a Nietzschean philosophy reading list.
What I appreciate about the following three books is that they are substantial, well-researched, relatable and practical guides for religious deconstruction, recovering from religious trauma or high-control religion, and cultivating an authentic, liberating and robust non-religious spirituality.
Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion by Marlene Winell
I’ve known Marlene Winell for many years. She is a pioneer in the field of religious deconstruction and Religious Trauma Syndrome. Leaving the Fold is one of the best comprehensive works on the leaving-religion process.
When Religion Hurts You: Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion by Laura Anderson
This is a relatively new book but probably the most complete and practical work on religious deconstruction since Marlene Winell’s book. Dr. Laura Anderson is a licensed psychotherapist, trauma resolution coach, and religious trauma consultant.
Top Three Niche Deconstruction Books
What I mean by “niche” in this case are religious deconstruction books that are especially relevant to specific groups of people.
1. Best Exvangelical Deconstruction Book
God After Deconstruction by Thomas Jay Oord
Tom Oord is a theologian and philosopher, and his religious deconstruction book especially connects with Exvangelicals who would want a trusted theological expert to help them sort through Christian doctrinal conundrums without bailing on God and Jesus entirely.
2. Best Ex-Mormon Deconstruction Book
How to Leave the Mormon Church: An Exmormon’s Guide to Rebuilding After Religion by Alyssa Grenfell
Probably the most comprehensive work on religious deconstruction for people leaving Mormonism.
3. Best Intersectionality Deconstruction Book
Our Lives Matter: A Womanist Queer Theology by Pamela R. Lightsey
Pamela R. Lightsey identifies as a black, queer, lesbian womanist, and her book addresses a number of religious and theological issues at the heart of intersectionality and religious deconstruction. “Intersectionality” is an area of focus in the program I lead that trains and certifies non-religious spiritual directors. For a crash course on the topic, give my article on Audre Lorde a read.
Top Three I’m-Done-With-God Deconstruction Books
Many religious deconstruction books serve as a bridge from what I call “Bad-God-Theology” to “Good-God-Theology”. In other words, a deconstruction process that re-frames traditional fear-based religious conceptions of God with a more loving view of God. But what if you are done with “God” altogether and not interested in formulating a new-and-improved version of the Almighty? Here are three books I would recommend.
Outgrowing God: A Beginner's Guide by Richard Dawkins
If a person has no interest in re-hashing better Christian theology and wants to cultivate a post-religion/”God” spirituality, this book is a great resource.
Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion by Sam Harris
Sam is one of a few notable Atheists who has cultivated, articulated and promoted a meaningful, robust, and liberating spirituality without God.
The Conquest of Happiness by Bertrand Russell
This is a useful, brilliant and practical book chock-full of wisdom and insights for living life well, from one of the most brilliant thinking Atheist philosophers of the 20th century. The work is particularly useful in aiding a person in re-orienting their thoughts and mindsets about happiness and well-being outside the framework of God, the supernatural and religion.
Top Three Alternative Christian Deconstruction Books
Unlike the above category, these three books relate to the deconstructing person who is interested in a Christian-ish alternative that has been wiped clean of most traditional or orthodox Christian theology. Don’t read too much into the words “traditional” or “orthodox” as if they should be understood as the “right” framework for Christianity. The following three books offer a legitimate non-traditional framework for a vibrant Christian-ish spirituality.
A Christian Natural Theology by John B. Cobb Jr.
John Cobb is an American theologian and philosopher. He is often regarded as the preeminent scholar in the field of process philosophy and process theology, the school of thought associated with the philosophy of Alfred North Whitehead. Cobb laid the groundwork for the birth of Open and Relational Theology.
Metamodernism is a relatively new term to identify the post post-modernism cultural ethos of our era. “Metamodern Christianity” is a view of Christianity from this metamodern perspective. Two videos I might watch on this subject, possibly before even reading any of the books in the above 6-book series are:
The New Gospel of Christian Atheism by Thomas Altizer
Obviously, this Christian-ish alternative is the most radical of the three. But as George Bernard Shaw wrote, “All great truths begin as blasphemies.” This seems to be the best book for exploring “Christian Atheism” and “death of God theology”. I have been writing a lot recently about the connection between Christianity and Atheism, and “death of God” themes.
Top Three LGBTQ+ Religious Deconstruction Books
Research shows that LGBTQ+ people — who represent more than 8% of the U.S. population, according to a 2023 Gallup poll — experience religious trauma at disproportionate rates and in unique ways. The following three books are focused on addressing the common biblical passages that have been falsely taught to the detriment of the LGBTQ+ community.
What the Bible Really Says about Homosexuality by Daniel A. Helminiak
Radical Love: Introduction to Queer Theology by Patrick S. Cheng
Changing Our Mind by David P. Gushee
Top Three Religion and Social Justice Deconstruction Books
Confessions of a Recovering Evangelical: Overcoming Fear and Certainty to Find Faith Through Doubt and Questioning by Dan Henderson
I wrote the Foreword to this book. In this work, Dan Henderson tells the story of his religious deconstruction as a white, male, Republican evangelical. It’s a rare book in that it extends the religious deconstruction conversation from an individual spiritual endeavor into areas such as politics, race, and social justice.
The Cross and the Lynching Tree by James Cone
Theologian James Cone, also author of, A Black Theology of Liberation, is a leading voice in “black theology” and it’s hard to imagine one could properly understand matters of race and religion apart from his writing.
The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir
Perhaps no patriarchal societal institution has victimized and oppressed women more than religion. You might as well go all the way and explore this issue to it’s core, which means reading The Second Sex. To explore this further you can read my philosophy series article on Simone de Beauvoir.
Top Three Books on Existentialism
Existentialism is philosophical inquiry that explores the issue of human existence. It’s common for a person in their deconstruction process to encounter existential philosophy. As mentioned previously, my articles about philosophers such as Friedrich Nietzsche and Albert Camus relate to this. I’m going to recommend three very different books in this category, none of which are for the faint of heart.
Seminal text for existential philosophy. Considered a brilliant and radical account of the human condition.
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
In this book, Viktor Frankl recounts his experiences surviving the Holocaust and describes how it shaped his understanding whereby we find meaning for our lives. Frankl pioneered Logotherapy, which is based on the premise that the primary motivational force of an individual is to find a meaning in life.
Existential Psychotherapy is widely considered to be the foundational text in the field of existential health. Organized around what Yalom identifies as the four “ultimate concerns of life”—death, freedom, isolation, and meaninglessness—the book takes up the meaning of each existential concern and the type of conflict that springs from our confrontation with each. It’s a technical but useful book. It’s not cheap, but there are some pdf versions.
Top Three Non-Religious Spirituality Books
I previously mentioned the book by Sam Harris, Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion. Three additional books I’d recommend in exploring non-religious spirituality would be:
Nature and the Human Soul: Cultivating Wholeness and Community in a Fragmented World by Bill Plotkin
Reason and Reverence: Religious Humanism for the 21st Century by William R. Murry
Beyond Religion: A Personal Program for Building a Spiritual Life Outside the Walls of Traditional Religion by David Elkins
Top Three Books on Jungian Psychology and Deconstruction
Carl Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist, psychotherapist and psychologist who founded the school of analytical psychology. It’s hard to imagine a person could plummet the depths of human development without Jung’s help. Three useful books for exploring the core concepts of Jungian psychology.
Top Three Books on Deconstruction and Humanist Psychology
I thought Jung deserved his own category, but here are three books I’d recommend in exploring humanist psychology
Top Three Religious Deconstruction Starter Books
What I mean by “starter” books are books that offer a lot of understanding, acceptance, and practical guidance in issues that often pop-up in the early stages of the leaving-religion process.
Raising Hell: Christianity’s Most Controversial Doctrine Put Under Fire by Julie Ferwerda
One of the most popular articles I published on Substack was on the topic of Hell. The doctrine of Hell has perhaps done more harm than any other Christian teaching. Julie’s book is a readable and straight forward examination of the traditional Evangelical Christian teachings about Hell. It’s not meant to be an academic or scholarly work, and is useful for a person who wants to maintain aspects of a Christian spirituality without Evangelical theology.
Returning to Eden: A Field Guide for the Spiritual Journey by Heather Hamilton
As I mentioned in this article, it’s a false choice to suggest the Bible can only either be the inerrant, infallible, sole truth from God to humankind OR the Bible is toxic and worthless. I have discussed issues related to the Bible and religious deconstruction in this article. I wrote the Foreword to Heather’s brilliant book. She offers a compelling and liberating mindset for approaching the Bible and biblical stories, which does not require an academic degree in hermeneutics.
Deconstructing Your Faith without Losing Yourself by Angela Herrington
This book is a heartfelt and instructive resource for cultivating empowering mindsets and tools for the deconstruction process with a focus on rebuilding one’s relationship with themselves. In my opinion, cultivating a healthy and whole self-relationship is foundational to the entire religious deconstruction process.
Top Three Human Development Deficit Deconstruction Books
Critical Thinking
Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman
Human Nature
The Blank Slate: The Modern Denial of Human Nature by Steven Pinker
Self-Worth/Acceptance
The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brené Brown
Top Three Science Books Related to Religious Deconstruction
The Awakened Brain: The New Science of Spirituality and Our Quest for an Inspired Life by Lisa Miller
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.
Religious Trauma Survival Guide: Education and Recovery Tools for Survivors and Professionals by Anna Clark Miller
Top Three Books Scientific Books that Address Life’s Meaning
The Meaning of Human Existence by Edward O. Wilson
Darwin’s Dangerous Idea by Daniel Dennett
Top Three Books for Exploring Eastern Spirituality
I discusses Buddha and Buddhist philosophy in this article in my philosophy series, which includes several book recommendations. A few foundational books I would recommend for a beginning exploration of Eastern Spirituality would be:
Essential Tibetan Buddhism by Robert Thurman
An introduction to Zen Buddhism by DT Suzuki
I Am That by Nisargadatta Maharaj
Top Three Books for an Introduction to Philosophy
Here are a few books for beginning a deep dive overview in the exploration of Western philosopher. I could have included A History of God by Karen Armstrong.
The Story of Philosophy by Will Durant
Twentieth-Century Philosophy of Religion by Oppy and Trakakis
Bonus Category: Three Best Books on Coffee :)
Anthony Trollope wrote, “What on earth could be more luxurious than a sofa, a book, and a cup of coffee?” So I couldn’t help myself and had to recommend three books on coffee.
Over the course of publishing 124 Substack articles, I have covered several topics related to religious deconstruction. A few of those articles I have mentioned throughout the above list of recommended books. What follows are a few additional deconstruction articles for easy access that you might find useful:
In the article I address the five most challenging realities of the leaving-religion process. I refer to them as “cold hard truths” because they are quite destabilizing or rattling, particularly when first faced in the deconstruction process.
An analysis of the impact of toxic religious indoctrination, and a plan for working through it.
In this article I discuss mistakes I made in my deconstruction process, avoiding leaving-religion pitfalls, landmines and useless detours, and how to leave religion without having a breakdown.
A five-part series on the deconstruction process.
A three-part series that looks at religion through the lens of evolution and anthropology.
I published five books about my own journey out of religion. Depending upon where you are currently in your process, you will find these books useful in the following ways:
Divine Nobodies: Shedding Religion to Find God (and the unlikely people who help you)
The story of the undoing of my religiosity - my religious assumptions, judgements, formulas, hypocrisy and pat answers.
Wide Open Spaces: Beyond Paint-by-Number Christianity
Deconstructing the theological underpinnings of my Christianity and charting a new path forward.
Being in Jesus in Nashville: Finding the Courage to Live Your Life (Whoever and Wherever You Are)
Coming to terms with who Jesus was, unhinged from the traditional Christian view and narrative.
Notes from (Over) the Edge: Unmasking the Truth to End Your Suffering
Exploration of non-religious spirituality and interior life, with an emphasis on addressing the root cause of personal suffering and living a life of true wellbeing.
Inner Anarchy: Dethroning God and Jesus to Save Ourselves and the World
Spelling out an alternative and universally applicable narrative about the life, message and significance of Jesus in defiance of traditional Christian teachings.
I've done a few podcasts interviews that you may find interesting. Below are the topics and podcasts.
The Christian Theism Debacle - jonathan_foster Podcast
Jonathan Foster made the mistake of inviting me as a guest on his podcast. Just kidding... I think. Not for the faint of heart.
The Evolution of Religion - Honoring the Journey Podcast
A talk with popular podcaster (Survivor contestant and ex-Christian author) Leslie Nease about the evolution of and impact of religion.
On being non-religious - Michael Camp Podcast
I sat down with Michael Camp to discuss if Jesus believed in “God”… and other things.
Outgrowing religion - Rose Woman Podcast
I was on the Rose Woman Podcast with Christine Marie Mason. We covered a lot of ground in this discussion, which I think you'll find interesting.
The unChristian Jesus - ACIM Podcast
I also stopped in to do a videocast with ACIM influencer, Brittney Shawley. Among other things, I shared my journey of how I walked away from the Jesus of Christianity and found the unChristian Jesus a meaningful part of my non-religious spirituality.
What is humanism? - Graceful Atheist Podcast
David Ames asked me if Humanism is the best path to follow in cultivating a post-religion spirituality. We discussed it.
The Death of Christian Theism - Jim Palmer Podcast
Is Christian theism the least defensible view of God or ultimate reality? I address this in my own podcast episode. Though I have taken a break from podcasting, you can check out all my previous episodes here.
In Summary
I hope you find these deconstruction books and resources useful; there are at least an additional 25 books that deserve to be on this summary list but I forced myself to only suggest three per category.
If you have books or resources you’d suggest in these categories, leave a comment.
Thank you for being a subscriber. This Substack publication would not be possible without you. If you find what I write and share meaningful, please consider recommending and sharing it with others. I appreciate you!
“As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?”
- Cassandra Clare
Your knowledge is amazing! As I read these articles and work on what it is I do believe, I’m often ask myself, what about prayer? It’s something I was told to do always. It’s a habit. I think of a song lyric by Chris Cornell, “lost like a prayer”. W we hat about prayer?
That's an amazing list! Thank you for helping with everyone's homework ;)
One problem - the Amagazon links. I hope most of the books are available in libraries. One can usually get books through a local bookstore even if they're not in stock.